


Blame

by 1MissMolly



Category: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: Character Death, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Episode: s04e01 The Six Thatchers, Spoilers, Text Messages
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-02
Updated: 2017-01-02
Packaged: 2018-09-14 06:28:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,194
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9166015
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/1MissMolly/pseuds/1MissMolly
Summary: A text message conversation between Sherlock and Molly after the Six Thatchers.I'm sure like so many other people, I cried during the last ten minutes of the Six Thatchers. I got onto AO3 to read all the stories that the episode would inspire and was shocked to see how many people were angry with John Watson. This is my interpretation of how the characters are dealing with the events in the story.No happy ending for anyone but maybe they can move on together.





	

Molly had just changed Rosemund’s diaper for the fourth time in an hour. The small child who had been suffering horribly from colic just a week before was now strangely quiet and docile. Maybe the infant had some incredible sense of the pain everyone else was in. Maybe, Rosemund could understand why her father couldn’t stop crying every time he held her. Maybe she was waiting for her mother to come back to her. Poor Rosemund.

Molly slowly walked Rosie around her small flat. John had left her with Molly while he went back to the cemetery again. He had been going every few days now. He would stay for just a few hours but each time he returned for Rosie, it seemed just a little more of him was missing. A little more had slipped away.

Molly tried not to cry. She needed to be strong for John and Rosie. So much had happened and now, John needed her. Her guilt for lying to him about Sherlock so many years ago seemed to be pulling her to be there even more now. Molly couldn’t stand to see John so torn up knowing she had been responsible last time for his pain.

Molly was singing softly to Rosie when her phone beeped with a text message. Carefully shifting the child to her left hip, Molly picked up the phone and looked at the message.

‘Is he alright?’ SH

Molly blinked a tear away as she read Sherlock’s text.

_< He’s hurting. I’m scared.>_

Molly hadn’t even acknowledged her fears to herself but to Sherlock she had to be honest.

‘Is he visiting her again?’ SH

_< Yes, every day this week>_

Molly glanced down and noticed the child was sleeping in her arms. She went to the travel playpen and gently laid Rosie down. She carefully rolled her on her side and braced a soft stuffed animal behind her back.

Molly’s phone binged again.

‘I want to help him.’ SH

Molly sat down on the couch and started to type back to Sherlock.

_< I know. We all do, but just don’t know how.>_

‘I never meant for this to happen.’ SH

_< I know. No one did.>_

Molly sighed and leaned back against the cushions. There would have been no way to have predicted this would have happened. It was ridiculous to even believe it was Sherlock’s fault.

‘Do you think he will ever forgive me?’ SH

_< John is hurting. I’ve never seen him this upset except for when he thought he lost you. It’s so much pain. I don’t know how he can bare it.>_

‘Do you believe he will harm himself?’ SH

Before Molly could answer him, Sherlock texted again.

‘Do I need to intervene?’ SH

_< No Sherlock. John won’t hurt himself. He won’t because of Rosie. It will be better this time than when you ‘died’.>_

‘I just want to help him. I care for John.’ SH

_< We all do. But he is stronger that you know.>_

‘He is the strongest person I know. And the best. Bravest. He is a good man walking through a battlefield.’ SH

_< You are too. A good man.>_

‘I’m selfish and cruel. You’ve even told me that. John hates me now. He won’t let me help him because I am so selfish.’ SH

_< Sherlock, he has lost his wife. He is pain.>_

‘I’m to blame for his pain.’ SH

_< John and I talked one night after Rosie fell asleep. He and Mary were having difficulties. He was beginning to doubt their commitment to each other. If you tell him I told you I will band you from the morgue.>_

‘Because Mary disappeared?’ SH

_< That and there was a woman.>_

‘John would never be unfaithful, Molly! Don’t even make such an accusation!’ SH

< _No, Sherlock. Just listen. John met a woman. He didn’t even know her name. She flirted with him. It made him feel like an attractive man again instead of an exhausted father or an old married man. But afterwards he felt guilty and told the woman they couldn’t speak again. He wasn’t unfaithful but it bothered him. Then Mary died and now he feels he betrayed her_. >

‘He shouldn’t.’ SH

< _Logic doesn’t work when someone is hurting as bad as John. He is grieving her loss, he feels guilty because of the woman, and he looks at Rosie and hates himself because her mother is gone. He is overwhelmed and saying things he really doesn’t mean_. >

‘He was right. I promised to take care of them. To protect them and I failed.’ SH

< _You can’t protect people against themselves, Sherlock_. >

‘If I hadn’t pushed it. If I hadn’t sought out an answer.’ SH

< _The man would have killed her_. >

Molly waited but Sherlock didn’t answer her.

< _Sherlock, blaming yourself won’t help John_. >

‘But he blames me.’ SH

< _He was lashing out. I keep telling you he is in pain. He says things he doesn’t mean. Like when he choked you in the restaurant when you first came back. He is emotion and you are logic. Please try to see it from his side_. >

‘Do you think he will ever forgive me?” SH

Molly looked at the message. A tear slipped from the corner of her eye and traveled down her face. She blinked the tears back. Should she be truthful or kind?

< _Will you forgive yourself? >_

Holding her breath, she waited for him to text.

‘Thank you, Molly.’ SH

She read the message, unsure if she should respond. There was a knock on her front door. Molly jumped off the couch in hopes it was Sherlock. She rushed to the door and opened it quickly. John Watson was standing there. His normal tan skin appeared grey and thin. There was more flecks of silver in his hair than she remembered. John’s shoulders were slumped and body seemed smaller. His beautiful blue eyes that were always so expressive and vibrant were listless.

“John, I wasn’t expecting you so soon.” Molly said trying to cover up her disappointment.

“Yeah, well I just couldn’t be at the grave today.” Even his voice was less.

“I just got Rosie off to sleep. She’s been rather fussy today. Come on in.” Molly stepped back and let John enter her flat.

John glanced around the room and finally let his eyes stay on his sleeping daughter. He took in a deep breath that raised his shoulders before they dropped again. His eyes seemed to even be frowning, dipping down at the corners.

“You don’t have to leave right away do you?” Molly asked. John glanced at her. “I mean unless you want too . . . I could make us some coffee . . . And talk. We could talk . . . about anything you like.”

A sad smile came to John’s lips.

“Thanks, Molly. That would be nice. I miss talking. Sherlock and I used to talk all the time. And really about nothing at all. It would be nice to talk.”

Molly smiled and led John into her tiny kitchen. It was a start. At least John had mentioned Sherlock’s name without sounding angry or bitter. Maybe she could help the two friends find their way back together.


End file.
